I’ve spent the last few days listening to pretty much the full Brian Eno discography.

It has made me incredibly angry.

After all, he’s the “king of ambient”, and I was afraid that listening to his music would just be depressing since one important aspect of the music I create as Bloodless Mushroom is ambient and I knew I could never aspire to such greatness. So I just went on doing my own thing and generally avoided listening, but was still worried that I was just copycatting things (even without having heard them).

I’ve been afraid to listen to a few artists over the years, but I won’t go into that here.

But, in my own hyper-opinionated view, Brian Eno’s music is “just OK”. Some of it is really good, some of it is average, and some of it is not good, but it is not all overwhelmingly one way or another.

So I’m angry.

Why did I spend so much time being afraid of what I’d hear? Why was I worried I couldn’t reach that creative level? Why was I worried that everything I created could probably be boiled town to copycat-ism?

Must be brain damage.

In any case I have nothing to worry about. Just keep going and keep working on getting better at the things I do. It sounds how it sounds, and even if some parts share similarities with other artists, it is still very much its own unique thing.